Mar 14, 2011
The day I took up the violin was the day I had to finally admit I was truly a geek. Oh, I had sort of known before that but the violin pretty much sealed the deal. The only reason I chose the violin over the flute was because strings started in fifth grade and band in sixth. Patience is not one of my strong suits.
Carrying a violin case in my neighborhood, in front of my "friends" was like painting a big red target on my back. Add in all the books I was always reading, the dorky clothes my mother made me wear and I was doomed. I'll never forget the laughter and the ridicule. Pure humiliation. Stupid, stupid...... what was I thinking.
It took me two years to ditch that violin. My parents had spent so much money on it I had to commit to it for at least a little while. But I wasn't going to carry that damn thing into Jr. High. At the end of sixth grade I made up some lame excuse and told Mr. Osborne, my violin teacher I wouldn't be continuing. I'll never forget the sad look on his face. Oh, to relive that day.
I spent the next nine years trying to be a hard-ass, a tough girl, a burnout. That's how you fit in where I came from. I didn't do a very convincing job. People who knew me really well weren't convinced. Neither was I. And you know what? I wasn't happy either. It's very stressful to try and be somebody your'e not.
I wish I could go back in time and give the 12 year old me some advice. Who gives a flying f**k what anybody thinks? Conformity is easy, different is hard. Hard always pays more rewards than easy in the end. Fitting in? Don't waste your time. It doesn't get you anywhere. I tried hard to teach my kids that lesson. I think I did, didn't I?
Anybody know where I can get some violin lessons?