Jul 14, 2009

Now that's a WorldPerk!

I fly several times a year, usually cross country. Being in Detroit the default airline is Northwest Airlines, or Northworst as they are, not so affectionately, known around here. They are in the middle of a merger with Delta Airlines.

I took a Delta flight recently. Compared to NWA it was like living in the lap of luxury. We had pillows and blankets, big seats and TV. They gave us peanuts. If I’m lying, I’m dying…. honest to goodness peanuts. I am very happy about this merger, so long as I don’t get screwed out of any of my frequent flyer miles.

NWA gave up free peanuts ages ago. You can however, purchase snacks for the flight. Your choices are cheese & fruit plate - $2; Mini-can of Pringles - $2; bag of M&M’s -$2 and for those who like the element of surprise in their snacking, the “Snack Box” - $5.

NWA also recently eliminated pillows and blankets, cheap bastards. They have small, cramped seats which gives the phrase “know thy neighbor” a whole new meaning. Don’t get me started on how they charge for checked luggage. This stupid policy encourages carry-on luggage, which brings the security and boarding process to a crawl. Before news of this merger, I fully expected to hear about them installing coin slots on the airplane lavatories.

Of course, NWA is not nearly as bad as Southwest Airlines. There are no assigned seats on SW flights. First come, first served. I took one flight with them. After being elbowed and shoved by my fellow passengers in their desperate attempt to get an aisle seat, I vowed never to fly with them again. Although I hear they are adding sunroofs to their planes now….. sounds intriguing. Maybe I’ll re-think my boycott.

SIDENOTE: Did you notice more commas in this post? Commas mystify me. Other than in lists of things, I just can't seem to place them properly. So, I decided that ,overuse of the comma is better, than underuse.


  1. You've just reminded me of everything I hate about flying. Could care less about plane crashes, I just hate being crammed into a small space with a bunch of people I don't know and don't, want, to, know.

  2. I had to fly every week for 4 years in my previous life as a politico, and you have reminded me of why I'm glad I don't do that anymore.

    And I'm with you on the Southwest thing. Just give me a seat number and leave me alone. I don't like competetive flying. It scares me.

  3. Hey, thanks for dropping by my blog. First, I like that profile photo. Love Kung Fu Hustle and those other odd movies she's in. Who'd a thought you could make a martial arts film about mah jong.

    Second, I recently flew on Delta and although we were offered peanuts (2 packs! twice!) and cookies, they also had those purchase options (a full dollar higher for each item!). Going out we had one of those swank planes with the tv in the seat. Had to purchase movies, though, which I think sucks. Coming back was not so nice - the plane was definitely shabbier. Still got 2 packs of peanuts, though.

    Third, the idea that there is a proper way to use commas is a recent invention. Look at some of Ann Radcliffe's stories. Back in those days they stitched their novels together with commas - the more the better.

  4. I know what you mean. I have flown all the major airlines and NWA was the worst even more than Southwest for me.

    BTW I have been having blog problems but I am getting it worked out. My blog has not disappeared.

  5. Thanks for the comments everybody. Disliking airlines and the way they treat us is a universal feeling I think.

    On another note, either nobody opened the link in this post or my joke was very bad. Sunroofs in SW planes = hole in fuselage that forced an emergency landing. Ah well, I won't bury my joke so deep in my post next time.

    Rae - you scared me. Glad it's just technical difficulties (hugs).

  6. Virgin airlines in Australia is the cheapie...you pay for everything on the plane, no frills at alll the seats are okay...but they charge the earth for luggage...hence the amount people are trying to stuff into the over head lockers beggars belief because thats still free...for now.