Mar 30, 2009

Sister, that ain't nothin.

One of the most annoying things my husband does is walk into the room when a bunch of us women folk are talking and start clucking like a hen. It’s annoying because it hits home a little bit. We tend to get all cranked up about certain subjects. There are a couple of sure-fire ways to get nearly every woman in the room talking. Discuss childbirth or weddings. I hate to admit it, but it’s true. We try to outdo each other with the gory details of our birthing experiences…..

24 hours of labor? Why that’s nothing. Try 48 hours of labor with no pain killers.
Ever had a forceps delivery? Now that’s pain.
I started hemorrhaging I nearly bled to death.
They started my cesarean section before the local anesthetic took effect.

If you close your eyes and use your imagination you can picture us all down by the river beating our clothes against the rocks chattering away. There’s some sort of universal, deep rooted need to share this information with the women in our lives.

What is particularly brutal is when we do it with a first time pregnant mother. It’s a good thing these fledgling mothers can’t change their minds about giving birth at that point because I’m sure many of them would. Veteran mothers are merciless. “You want to be part of the club you gots to pay your dues.”

Weddings have a similar effect except that bloody, painful birthing details are replaced with horror stories about late wedding party members or inconsiderate and rude family members. Everybody had a last minute crises that nearly caused the wedding to be canceled.

But I will gladly take all the chattering over the most common methods of male communication, the grunt and the nod.


  1. ..(grunt,..nod)..Oh wait!..This is Bloggertown!
    I can get a word in edgewise!
    ..ummm..Have you seen my toenail clippers?

  2. Sling - should have said present company excluded.

  3. have no comment... Just came to see what Slings comment was. :)

  4. Lost - Sling is worth the trip and even when only grunting and nodding he is still a pretty witty fellow.

  5. Shouldn't talk about this stuff in front of any first time mothers..never...ever

  6. Um, I sooo don't want to hear those horror stories, as I haven't had kids yet, but want to someday--and I don't want to get too freaked out about labor and delivery!! :)

  7. MC - I know but I've seen women get carried away. A good swift kick to the shins usually reminds them to shut their yaps.

    MH - The beauty of pregnancy is that by the ninth month you are willing to go through just about anything to be done with it.