Mar 2, 2009

“How goes the wedding planning?”

Just peachy, thanks for asking. This weekend I learned that the MOB (Mother-of-the-Bride in wedding industry speak) has quite a reputation. From what I can tell so far I am supposed to be some sort of cross between a flighty thing that breaks down in tears at the drop of a hat and a demanding b**ch for whom nobody can perform properly. I’m not either of those things. I wonder if the process transforms me in some way. I guess only time will tell.

It’s very annoying how they all keep asking me questions instead of asking my daughter. It’s her wedding not mine. She values my opinion but this is her big day so she gets to make the final decisions. I’m getting the feeling it doesn’t normally go that way.

The FOB (Father-of-the-bride) has requested that two days per week we don’t do any wedding planning at all. In an effort to keep him from developing a nervous tic I guess we will comply. He is having a hard time adjusting to the notion of spending thousands of dollars for a one day event. For that price tag, he reasons, we should be traveling somewhere exotic. I haven't told him about "destination weddings". I wouldn't want him to have stroke.

Watching him get used to this whole wedding thing is sort of like watching somebody get into a cold pool. They dip one foot in, gasp in horror and pull it back out again, all the while knowing that they will have to go in all the way. My advice has been "jump on in" but he has chosen the “gradually expose yourself to the cold water” approach.

I got some surprising moral support on the budget side of things from my father. He is the only person on earth who pinches a penny tighter than my husband. When we told him how much we planned on spending he said. “Well that’s not bad, I heard that the average wedding today costs $25,000.” Dad, I love’ ya. FOB just stood there in disbelief. The one person he was counting on to commiserate with had abandoned him.

We found a place for the reception this weekend. It’s a beautiful place at a reasonable price. It won’t be too fancy but people won’t be eating off paper plates either. Next on the agenda is the wedding dress and photographer.


  1. Has the wedding date been set?
    This is a great story Thinker.FOB is just gonna have to do what all FOB's do.
    Keep the checkbook handy,and stay outta the way.

  2. Wedding is set for October 16th. Friday weddings are cheaper, dontcha know? It's starting to dawn on FOB that he has no hope of turning this ship around... iceberg ahead!

  3. Wow, you have just discovered the best way to have a money conversation with Dad. Just leave some article around about cost trends, like new homes, cars, mske sure it reflects a really hihg market, etc. and he won't flip out when you say how much yours cost. Still can't get over that guilty little girl feeling I get with him.:-0

  4. Try having your daughter married to a greek Australian (whom i really like) but who has relatives on his relatives...our lot filled about 3 of the 18 tables. There were 8 on each table. Go figure. her dress was a work of art and I thunk back to my $10 cotton dress...which I still have...I am glad she had it though for some me crazy. Good luck with all this.